Roast mode

App roasts

We read the App Store reviews and roast the app. Never the people. Every roast ends with what users truly love.

Fresh from the roast

“Claude can write your whole app in an afternoon, but it can't stop chiming at you. Someone needs a mute button.”

“Insight Timer asks so many goal questions on startup, you'd think it was applying for a job.”

“It answers everything with total confidence, even when the answer was made up on the spot.”

“Duolingo's energy meter runs out faster than my patience on a Monday morning.”

“Instagram, your bans arrive faster than your new accounts can post a first photo.”

“New features reach some users about 4 months late, so TikTok is basically a time traveler with bad timing.”

“Gmail on iOS is so big it needs its own zip code. Seven hundred megabytes just to say hi.”

Paste an App Store link. We build the teardown first. Then click "Roast it" on the page.